First put on a comfortable sweatshirt, one that fits. If the sleeves are too long, they’ll get caught on your hands when you’re typing and mask the keys.
Next, get yourself a snack, something that tastes relatively bland, so you won’t want to get up to grab more, but something that will also fill you up. Maybe rice with a little butter.
Make sure you have a hot cup of coffee—caffeinated, of course. But drink it after you’ve already gone to the bathroom so you won’t have to get up mid-writing. If you opted out of the sweatshirt, the coffee will also keep you warm. Though it’s tempting, do not dunk your hand in the coffee. It will burn you, and you will only have one hand to type with, and the frustration of typing with one hand will cause you to just give up completely. This is why the first step is vital.
Do not look at Twitter. In fact, log out of Twitter. You might think someone’s tweet somewhere in the twitterverse might give you an idea for a story or a poem or essay or blog post. It won’t. You will just find yourself mindlessly scrolling into a pit of despair.
Better yet, turn off your internet. But you need to look up the definition of the work postulate? Well, if you don’t have a dictionary, maybe it’s okay if you just…No!
If you can resist those urges, and can put down one solid idea in the mix of a bunch of other not-so-good ones, the caffeine will kick in. But what about the noncaffeinated writers? Start a conversation with yourself. Back and forth like you’re two different people. Hype yourself up. Ask about the story. Pretty soon you’ll be as pumped as you would have been if you had a cup of coffee. Try not to bring yourself down when talking to yourself. You don’t want to end up sitting in a corner feeling doomed or crushed by the inability to write. But you won’t, because you are in this!
After all of this, you should be ready to write. And if not, maybe these tips weren’t useful after all.
Best,
Kennedy, fiction reader & editor
The Minnesota Review 