What Evals Would Look Like If I Were My Student

The semester is coming to a close, and my students will be filling out their evaluations next week.     My evaluations are generally good-to-boring, and I’ve yet to receive a really negative one. That doesn’t prevent my brain from conjuring up a horrific list of possible comments based on the parts of my teaching I’m insecure about. Here are some examples:

“Often began anecdotes and then forgot how they related to the lesson.”

“Does not seem to own an iron.”

“Wears incredibly squeaky shoes.”

“Once accidentally dropped the f-bomb and then spent thirty seconds awkwardly apologizing for it.”

“Dresses like an old man living in a post-apocalyptic little house on the prairie.”

“Sometimes forgets really obvious words…like ‘chalk.’”

“Too many puns.”

“Makes jokes that no one understands and then laughs at them…a lot.”

“Sometimes paces nervously around the room.”

“May be a robot.”

“Shares a similar leadership style to Captain Kirk.”

“Made far more science fiction references than justified by class discussion.”

“Repeatedly confused me with the other tall blonde guy with glasses.”

 Jessica Bates shares her name with Debra Winger’s character’s undercover persona in the 1987 neo-noir thriller Black Widow. However, she doesn’t really recommend that movie.


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